SKEPTICAL

There’s a little skeptic in all of us.

And while I’d much rather embrace the pure, innocent naivete of youth, there are just some things that I’m not buying.

We’ve all got stuff that we’re suspicious of and we’re usually not too shy about it. We like being cynical and disbelieving, but I’m not sure I know the real reason why. Maybe ’cause we’re all totally messed up?

It could be that.

Skepticism is interesting because it thrives the absence of evidence and it’s a weird logic circle to find yourself in.

YOU: I’m skeptical of that. I don’t think that’s for real.
FRIEND: Why don’t you believe it?
YOU: I don’t know. I’m just not buying it. I’m gonna’ need some evidence to prove it!
FRIEND: Do you have proof that it’s fake?
YOU: Nope.
FRIEND: So you demand evidence to prove it while firmly maintaining you have no evidence to combat it to begin with?
YOU: Right.
FRIEND: Why are we friends?

Below are some things I’m skeptical of.

  1. OnStar commercials. I think they’re real recordings, but I think the sirens are dubbed in later. I’m not sure a cell phone or OnStar microphone would pick up sirens that clearly. I totally support it, though. How lame would a commercial be if the guy is yelling, “The cops are here! They’re here! Thank God they’re here!” and no sirens were heard? We’d think that man had a head injury. And then we wouldn’t want OnStar. I’m like a marketing genius over here, y’all.

  2. DJ laughter. Nobody is that happy. Especially talking to a wall full of PSAs and office memos.
  3. Waking up early. I have friends that tell me starting the day earlier is better for me, my health and my life. But I’m skeptical that those friends are crazy and talk jibber-jabber.
  4. Criss Angel. I don’t think that guy really has magical powers. (David Blaine is another story. I think he’s possessed.)
  5. Snakes won’t “bother” me. I don’t spend a lot of time with snakes, but they seem pretty unpredictable to me. Every time I talk to someone who has assured me that the snake isn’t going to bother me, I find out that, yeah, he’ll bite you, but it doesn’t hurt all that bad. What about when I jump backwards, screaming and flailing my arms and careen into an immovable object? That’ll probably hurt, right?
  6. Elvis died in 1977. I don’t think he’s still alive. (I’m not a moron. Sheesh.) But when I was dating Kristen, we watched this cool documentary called ‘The Elvis Files’ and there was tons of convincing evidence and we went back to rent it to share the information with friends and loved ones and the guy at Blockbuster said that the tape had been ‘damaged’ and was unable to be ‘repaired’ and they couldn’t order any more. COVER. UP.
  7. Blu-Ray is worth the money. I’ve seen stuff on Blu-Ray and I’ll agree it looks really good. But so far, I haven’t seen anything in this higher quality that made me appreciate a film any differently.
  8. Drumloops do anything in worship. This may be a little too inside for such a broad idea, but every time I use a loop in worship, I realize that the only people who seem to like – or even hear – the loop are the musicians on stage. Seems like a lot of work that doesn’t really have a real benefit in a congregation.
  9. “Jesus was a tough guy” talks. This whole presentation of Jesus isn’t really all that nuanced. I think most of us got it the first time when we read John Elderidge. Anytime a dude gets up and opens with Jesus-was-a-tough-guy, I disconnect. Jesus was a man. I think I’ve got it. Find a new story.
  10. Companies that you can hire to publish your own work. I’ve never really tried these, but I imagine that TOP HIT RECORD COMPANY is just a dude in a portable building who’s found out how to nab credit card numbers from wannabe rock stars.

Your turn, you skeptic! Share with the group!

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2 comments

  1. Johnny!

    Loops (and even clicks) do one thing in worship: ruin the pocket. Because everyone BUT the drummer (he's the only one listening in the monitors) is pulling ahead of the darn thing.

  2. Liz

    I soooo thought you were gonna go in a different direction with this post…like spiritual stuff you didn't believe in/are skeptical of. I thought I was gonna have to break out a can of Pentacostal on ya. HA HA!

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