FIVE WEIRDEST THOUGHTS

Hey gang! Well it’s the day after Easter and I hope you had a fantastic day celebrating the mercy and power of Christ! Since I knew I would be exhausted today (like all of you), I asked a friend of mine to write a guest post for us.

John Simmons is one of the best drummers I’ve ever had the privilege of knowing. In addition to being an amazing musician, Johnny is theological powerhouse whose tweets and blog posts have challenged (and confused me) for years. As a professional drummer, Johnny has played lots of places and seen lots of weirdness.

And because we like to keep it fun around here, I asked him to share with us the 5 Weirdest Thoughts He’s Ever Had While Drumming. Johnny does not disappoint.
We all are tempted with distracting thoughts. Usually they’re of the mundane variety, like,

“Quit rushing. Quit rushing! No, really, QUIT. RUSHING.”

One usually gets his snap, repents, and tries to go on about his business. But sometimes, things get so odd it’s hard to recover.

Todd asked me to remember some of those magical moments, and so, I give you:

  1. “Oh look, that woman in the back aisle is interpretive dancing. Don’tlaughdon’tlaughdon’tlaugh…”
    I’ve actually had to keep my pious cool for dancers on far more occasions than I like to admit.
  2. “Hey, Roger Ebert is here! Hi, Roger.” Turns out it wasn’t him.
  3. “I could totally make them have to kick back into the chorus right now.” This at the end of a breakdown ending, as that last note hung in the silence. One big drum fill is all it would have taken.
  4. “This is like liturgical blackface.” Rock band trying a Gospel tune.
  5. This needs some setup. My band (led by a couple) were playing the last night of a camp, and they brought in a guy who plays Jesus at a drive-through “Bible Land” to PRESIDE OVER COMMUNION. In the middle of our Communion set, he comes out and starts WASHING THE FEET of the bandleader’s wife. All I could think of on my friend’s behalf was “Hey, Jesus, get off my wife!” Then he (He?) comes over and starts praying over each of us as we play. So my bonus weird thought is: “Get off me, Jesus, I’m trying to play drums here.”

Johnny Simmons, ladies and gentlemen. He does not disappoint. If you’d like to follow Johnny, you can do so via twitter or his website. And if you’re lucky, you’ll get to experience one of his famous “tweetsplosions.” You should be so lucky.

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2 comments

  1. lizreeves

    #1 & #3 are my favorites!!
    I once asked Larry what his craziest thought while preaching was. He couldn’t come up with much because you kinda have to focus while preaching, but he did share something about having to NOT THINK OF dripping faucets & waterfalls. LOL

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